


Beyond Love

by Potterwatch97



Series: All The Little Drabbles [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel 616, The Amazing Spider-Man (2012), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Depression, Earth-616 Characters, F/M, Gen, I got feels writing this, M/M, Marvel 616/MCU Crossover, Minor Character Death, no seriously I cried
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-17
Updated: 2014-06-27
Packaged: 2017-12-26 20:05:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/969755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Potterwatch97/pseuds/Potterwatch97
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a final battle with Ultron, many Avengers are killed, including one Peter Rogers-Stark (AKA Spider-Man). Things become strained in Avengers Mansion. Steve seeks revenge, not wanting to believe his son is dead. Meanwhile, Tony falls into a severe depression, losing his will to fight, turning to alcohol for comfort. But with no body ever recovered, could the Captain be right in assuming their son is still out there after all?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> SOOOO... I totally was so excited to write this, you guys have no idea. I got this prompt on... Friday? I think? I'm not sure BUT I have been so excited about this, I have loved writing it, and I hope you enjoy. I'll try to post every couple of days.
> 
> Prompt from throughhollowedeyes: "Hello! I have had this prompt in my head for a while. Prompt: Tony and Steve finally have to accept that their only son, Peter, is dead. But his death takes its toll on their marriage. Then (after any amount of time you want) Peter is found alive. Can Steve and Tony repair their marriage for their son’s sake or is it too late?"
> 
> So, yeah. Enjoy. :3
> 
> DISCLAIMER: The Avengers, Spider-Man, and everyone you see here belongs to either Disney, Marvel, Stan Lee, Fox.... pretty much everyone that isn't me.

"Humans are a flawed race. Humans have failed as a species. Termination is inevitable. Please, do not resist."

"Cap! Who are we missing? Cap?!"

_"Iron... can't keep... shield... Reed... no... no- STOP!"_

"Cap?! Steve... Steve, what's happening?"

_"Mr.... and... down... Marvel... Witch.... Fallen bodies...._

_"Pop... Cap!... elp!"_

"Peter! Peter, what are you doing here?! Cap, I'm losing your com signal! I'm trapped in some mine, the tunnel collapsed! I'm in here with Hulk and Yellow Jacket."

_"I... should... here... home... Man! Now!"_

"Tony, he's not waking up! He's not even changing back, Tony, I think hes..."

"Hulk is down! I repeat, Hulk is down! Can anyone hear me?! Iron Man, Yellow Jacket, and Hulk are trapped in a collapsed mine tunnel. Is there anyone out there left?!"

"Do not resist. Humans are a flawed race, and therefore must be terminated. Please, do not resist...."

~

"Humans are a flawed race. Humans have failed as a species. Termination is inevitable. Please, do not resist."

_"Cap!... missing... ap?"_

"Iron Man, we can't keep Ultron restrained to one area. He... he destroyed my shield with one of his rays. The Four just I arrived, but I don't think they'll- Reed, wait! No! No- STOP!"

_"Cap?!... appening?!"_

"Mr. Fantastic, Ms. Marvel, and Scarlet Witch are down. I repeat, Mr. Fantastic, Ms. Marvel, and Scarlet Witch are down. Location of fallen bodies unknown...."

"Pops! I, uh, I mean, Cap! I'm here to help!"

"Peter?! No, what are you doing here?"

"I have a com, Cap, call me Spider-Man!"

_"Peter!... here?! Cap... losing... ignal... trap... rocks... Jacket."_

"I don't care! You shouldn't be here! Go home, Spider-Man! Now!"

_"Tony... up.... Not... change... he-"_

_"Hulk... repeat... down.... Mine... collapse... any... left?!"_

"Cap, if Iron Man is trapped I can use my webs and my strength to get him out so he can fight again! Come on, Cap!"

"No, Peter, that's directly in the line of fire- Peter, no! What are you... Peter! PETER! NO!"

"Do not resist. Humans are a flawed race, and therefore must be terminated. Please, do not resist...."


	2. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the Battle of Ultron.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one didn't get updated like I had wanted. Birthday party and then Homecoming dance, I just never got around to finishing this chapter and posting. But, it is here now, and regular posting updates will be pushed back a day to every Wednesday and Saturday. I may also extend the story past six chapters... not sure yet.
> 
> Also, if Steve seems OOC in this, he is supposed to.
> 
> Enjoy :)

A month passes. Funerals are held within that time. Carol Danvers, Reed Richards, Clint Barton, Bruce Banner, and Wanda Maximoff. All gone. No bodies were ever found, apart from Bruce's, who had been somehow killed by the cave-in in the mine.

Carol and Clint's were private affairs. The Avengers, a few X-Men who were in the battle, the remaining Four, and a few SHIELD and SWORD agents. They were quick, closed casket, their 'bodies' buried in official government cemeteries.

Bruce had donated his body to science, to further the research on the Hulk and gamma radiation. He hadn't wanted a funeral and so there was none.

Wanda was taken care of by Professor Xavier and the X-Men, gravestone placed in the garden of the Institute.

Reed's was difficult and draining. Many people came, superheroes, agents, members of the scientific community, Reed's colleagues. It was a private thing, no paparazzi, no FF fans. Sue held Franklin as he cried for his father, Johnny held Sue as she cried for her husbands, him and Ben grieving for their friend and teammate.

Peter's was the worst. Not long after the fight it became public that Peter Parker and Spider-Man were one. Friends from school, Harry, MJ, and Gwen all cried and grieved together. Ava, Luke, Danny, and Sam all wept for their fallen leader.

Hank Pym became distraught over what his creation had done. He tortured himself night and day with the knowledge that his invention had lead to the death of so many civilians, Avengers, and the only son of his closest friends. Him and Janet grew further apart. One day if became too much for Hank, and he left he Avengers, leaving Janet and the Ant-Man armor behind with a simple note of "I'm sorry."

His suicide was another strike that no one could handle.

The Avengers mourned the loss of their family members, but none as much as Steve and Tony.

Tony was distraught. Wrecked with grief. He wouldn't talk, he wouldn't eat, he couldn't sleep, and he didn't work. Nothing that anyone did made things any better. He turned to alcohol, an old comfort, to rid the pain. It never worked. If anything it made his feelings worse.

Steve was an angry mess. He wanted the metaphorical blood of his son's killer on his hands. He wanted revenge: he wanted to see the end of Ultron and everything he was. And he would stop at nothing to avenge the death of his baby boy.

Everything got worse over the next six months.

Not a word from Ultron. Doom, Venom, Kree and other aliens, anything you could think of all came and went, and the Avengers dealt with it as always.

About two months after the funerals things changed for the Avengers.

_"I'd like everyone to meet Jessica Drew, Katherine Bishop, and Jennifer Walters. Codenames... Spider-Woman, Hawkeye II, and She-Hulk."_

_Everyone stared at the three standing next to Cap, looking at Steve as if he'd lost his mind._

_Jessica Drew was a tall woman, with black hair, wearing a red and gold body suit with a red, gold, and black mask over her eyes._

_Katherine Bishop they knew, from her time as an "understudy" to Clint. She wore the usual black and purple outfit, hoisting Clint's bow._

_Jennifer Walters was a sight to see. Incredibly tall, muscular, black haired, green skinned woman. They knew her to be the cousin of Bruce._

_"They're going to be replacing empty positions on the Avengers Initiative."_

_"Um, Cap?" Logan grumbled from the corner. "There were only two open positions... Last I checked."_

_"Iron Man has been benched for an undetermined amount of time," Steve spoke softly, looking towards the floor. "He was caught intoxicated on the job and it was decided that for the best interests of the team he be removed for the time being. He's a liability... Until he gets out from his... Until he's... Until he's ready... Iron Man is no longer an Avenger."_

Tony had taken being benched extremely well. He began working again, if only to build new weapons and armor for the team to use.

Steve disapproved. Tony was always drunk, reverting back to his alcoholic ways. He argued to Steve that he had always done his best work drunk or intoxicated. Or under pressure. Or emotional distress. All of which he was feeling.

He and Steve argued more now than ever. Before, they traded quips back and forth, affectionate arguments that they never really meant. It was just how they showed their feelings for each other. Now it was real. It was angry. It was violent and ugly and almost always ended up in threats. Tony didn't approve of Steve's suicide missions. Steve didn't approve of Tony's self destruction.

_"I'm always careful, Tony."_

_"No! No you're not! You're always gone! Looking for another enemy to fight, another villain to interrogate about the whereabouts of Ultron, any sign or indication of where he might be!"_

_"Because I want-"_

_"You want **what**? What is it that you want? You want to fight? You want to kill him? Do you want to die?!"_

_"Oh, that's rich-"_

_"No, it's not rich, it's the fucking truth! You know Ultron, you've fought him before! No matter what we do, no matter how many times we defeat him he always comes back! And not only that, but he always comes back stronger than before! We thought once we had defeated him but look what happened! He came back, not only stronger than before but smarter too! He took over our com systems, he shut down the Vision, and took over mine and Sam's armor. And we thought we had the power to beat him. And look how that turned out for us!"_

_"I'm not going to sit back while our son-"_

**_"OUR SON IS DEAD, STEVE!"_ ******

_"But what if he's-"_

_"Not? What if he's not? You saw it! You witnessed it with your own eyes. He hit Peter with that same ray that destroyed your shield and every other Avenger he killed. And you think that our son, our **seventeen year old inexperienced son** , would survive that?! He's gone, Steve. Give up on this dream. It's over. We lost."_

Tony feared for months that one day Steve would leave on his "missions" and never return. He'd already lost his son, he wasn't about to loose Steve as well.

He wouldn't sit and watch Steve work himself ragged over a pipe dream. And Steve couldn't sit and watch Tony waste away while he could be doing everything in his power to avenge his son.

One day it all became too much.

_Logan, Kate, and Hank McCoy walked in the mansions kitchen to see Tony, sitting at the counter, an empty and half full bottle of vodka by his side, an empty tumbler in his hand._

_"Tony," Hank sounded surprised. "What are you-"_

_"He's gone."_

_They froze. No one knew that to say. Kate stepped forward._

_"Tony... Who's gone?"_

_"Steve."_

_"Wait, you mean he-"_

_"No, **Howlett** , he's not dead. Not yet anyway."_

_"Then what do you mean he's-"_

_"He upped and packed his bags. And he left. He said to be sure to tell you that he's still going to lead the team, just not from the mansion."_

_"Why did he leave?"_

**_"I'm not doing this any more Tony. I'm done. I'm leaving."_**

**_"Why? Because I told you to stop trying I kill yourself?"_ **

**_"Because you are giving up. And I'm not. I don't want to do this right now, Tony."_ **

**_"This again? Are you kidding me?! He's dead, Steve. Give it up."_ **

**_"And that's why I'm leaving."_ **

**_"Why, because I don't agree with your useless suicide missions."_ **

**_"Because I obviously care more about him than you do."_ **

_"I don't know, Hank."_

**_"Fuck you,_ Captain. _I hope you go to hell."_**

**_Steve looked him in the eye as he opened the door. "If that's what it takes."_ **

_"But honestly, at this point, I'm not sure if I care."_

That had been two months ago. Tony hadn't talked to Steve since.

Things had changed for the Avengers in the past six months. And not exactly for the better.


	3. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK SO IM SORRY IT’S BEEN SO LONG IM A TERRIBLE PERSON.  
> It’s actually not my fault really, my computer gave me the “blue screen of death” so I had to reset my computer and I lost EVERYTHING I wrote for this story and all my other fanfictions. But I rewrote this from scratch in-between school, work, and other stories. So here it is.
> 
> I also had so much trouble remembering who I killed. I didn’t remember killing Bruce or Clint so I got halfway through this chapter before I realized. I had to substitute Johnny for Clint for comic relief and Sam taking care of Tony instead of Bruce :(
> 
> This chapter was inspired by the song ‘Turn Your Face’ by Little Mix.

The sun was shining brightly, the hot, sticky air beating down on the three figures running around the playground.

_“Daddy! Daddy, watch this!”_

Tony turned his head and watched the swing go higher and higher, knowing his son was going to jump off once again.

 _“Pete, be careful,”_ Steve said for the hundredth time.

When he was finally high enough he swung off, pushing his arms behind him and making a “pshhhhhhh” sound. When he landed, he ran toward Tony, a huge smile lighting up his face.

_“Daddy, did you see that? I was flying! I was flying like Iron Man!”_

_“Yeah, you were-”_

_“I wish I could be like you and Papa, Daddy, I wish I could be a superhero and fly through the sky with you and Uncle Thor and Uncle Johnny and fight bad guys, just like you!”_

Tony smiled and shot a look at a smirking Steve.

_“Maybe one day, kiddo. Maybe”_

\-------------------------------------------

The buzzing alarm jerked Tony awake, hitting the table next to him and knocking over and shattering something on it. He looked around dazed before his dream came back to him.

_“I wish I could be like you and Papa, Daddy.”_

He buried his face in his hands, feeling wetness from his eyes and took a shuddering breath.

_“I was flying! I was flying like Iron Man!”_

Looking up and looking around he realized he was in Steve and his bedroom, a room he hadn't been in since Steve walked out on him.

_“Fuck you, Captain. I hope you go to hell.”_

_“If that’s what it takes.”_

He glanced down at his wedding ring on his finger. He didn’t know why he still wore it but he just couldn't take it off. He knew from Logan that Steve didn’t wear his anymore, but Natasha had assured him that Steve still wore it on a necklace around his neck. But no, it wasn’t where it should be.

“Jarvis… how did I-”

“Mr. Wilson found you unconscious in your lab with high levels of alcohol in your blood, sir. He asked Mr. Odinson to take you somewhere more comfortable.”

Oh. Sam would. Made sense. Also explained the hangover, but those were frequent nowadays anyway. Especially with Steve not around to stop it, and Logan there to endorse it.

He looked around once more and decided to take a shower to clear his head. Plus, last he remembered he had been in that lab for two weeks straight. Kinda gross. Or a lot. He didn’t care. He put his foot down and stood slowly.

“Ow! What the fuck…”

He looked down and saw the glass and upside down frame on the floor. Ignoring what was undoubtedly glass in his foot- really he’d had much worse -he reached down to pick up the frame. He regretted it immediately.

It was a picture of the day they had brought Peter home from the hospital. A 27 year old woman and her husband had put him up for adoption because their line of work was too dangerous for having children. Mary and Richard had thought he and Steve were perfect for their baby boy. They stayed in touch, but died in an unexpected plane crash six years later.

The Picture showed Peter in Steve and Tony's arms, surrounded by all the Avengers. Bruce had taken the picture because he was afraid he would break Peter if he went near him. It was the happiest day of Tony’s life, and it showed. Steve and his faces were glowing. The longer Tony looked at the picture the more his hands shook. He closed his eyes and let out a choked sob.

_“I wish I could be a superhero and fly through the sky with you….”_

Tony fell back on the bed, shaking with silent sobs, clutching the broken frame to his chest, cutting himself with more broken glass.

Fucking shower would have to wait.

\-------------------------------------------

_“Peter?!”_

“No sign of Ultron from anywhere over the world, Cap. We have SHIELD searching all attack accounts, all cameras, scanning computers, on the lookout the unique radiation Ultron gave off. Honestly though, no one knows what they’re looking for, we need Pym-”

“We don’t have Pym, Johnny…”

_“Uhh… hi Pops. Fancy seeing you around here,” Peter smiled up guiltily at his father._

_Steve simply stared back in shock at the red and blue clad teen on his knees in front of him, shield and Spider-Man mask hanging limply from his hand._

_“So… what brings you to this neck of the woods?”_

“On a side note, Natasha, Jessica, and Brian have successfully taken down the HYDRA organization hiding in Germany working under Ultron. Honestly, why they chose Germany is beyond me, that’s like the first place I’d look-”

“Get to the point, Johnny…”

_“Peter… are you serious? Are you fucking kidding me right now?”_

_Peter blanched. “You cursed… I’m screwed.”_

_“You.. you’re Spider-Man?! What, do you have some kind of death wish?! Do you want to be killed!?” Steve’s face was purple in anger._

_“No! No, not at all… at least… I don’t plan on dying, but hey, shit happens-”_

_“SHIT HAPPENS? We’re talking about your fucking life and all you have to say is ‘SHIT HAPPENS!?”_

“And as you can see, Sam, me, and Logan are back from tour mission in Africa to take down the AIM base building an arsenal from an unknown material source-”

“I’ve checked with T’Challa, Cap, it’s not any metal that he recognizes and has no similarities to Vibranium, so we believe that AIM was not building for Ultron. I’ll see if Stark can analyze it and find similar properties to other known materials used by AIM or HYDRA, maybe ask Thor if it’s from another realm….”

_“Look, I’m not going to say I’m sorry, alright? I’m doing what I feel like I have to do! You and Dad raised me to be strong and to take care of myself and to always help others who need help. Well I’m helping, Pops, let me help-”_

_“No,” Steve looked to Peter, his face now pale and his eyes shining. “No, not you. I can’t risk losing you.”_

_Suddenly, Peter stood, angry. “How do you think I felt then!? Sitting at home five times a week with nothing but another Avenger as a babysitter, waiting for my parents to come home when I know that every time they leave, there is a chance they might not ever come back. Getting called to the Principal's office to be told that Uncle Clint or Aunt Natasha or Aunt Pepper or Uncle Sam was picking me up and taking me to the hospital because one of you was hurt? Well I’m done doing that!” Tears leaked from Peter’s eyes. “I’m tired of not being able to protect the people I love, and if I couldn’t protect Uncle Ben when I was just normal before, how would I ever have a chance of protecting you, or Dad, or Gwen, or Aunt May, or anyone else if all I do is sit by and do nothing!?”_

_“Pete…”_

_“I made a promise, Pop. I made a promise to Uncle Ben. I got bit by that damn radioactive spider, and now I have power. Power that comes with responsibilities, the main one being to protect my family. And that is exactly what I will use this power to do, whether you want me to or not. You can’t stop me.”_

_Steve took a step forward, grabbing his son by the shoulders. “Not like this, Pete. Please not like this… I can’t lose you."_

_“I can’t lose anyone else either.”_

_He pulled Pete down until they were both kneeling, holding each other closely. “I don’t want you to die.”_

_Peter pulled back a little and smiled. “Funny thing is… I’m not all too worried about that. Because I know that you and Dad will always be there to save me.”_

“...and Sam is having Logan’s twin half wolf, half falcon babies, and I have a unicorn horn growing out my ass.”

Steve jerked hearing that last sentence, memory fading to the back of his consciousness. “What?”

“Did you not hear any of that report, Rogers?” Johnny looked put out.

“Uh…”

“What’s the last thing you remember?”

Steve’s face scrunched up in thought. "Something about asking Thor about metal from another realm?”

Johnny nearly face palmed. “Are you fucking serious? That was like thirty minutes ago! And I actually prepared for this meeting, Cap, which is precious hours of my research-”

“Ahem.”

“- _Janet’s_ perfectly good research and PowerPoint outline, wasted!”

Steve leaned forward, rubbing his eyes and sighing heavily. Johnny sagged slightly; looking at Cap with his shoulders down he suddenly looked fifty years older and like the weight of the world was placed upon him.

He slumped, defeated. “Right, well, I have to get back to Baxter for Sue and Franklin. Sam, Buck, you catch him up… I’m going to go. Umm.. yeah. Dismissed.”

Steve leaned back and nodded at everyone who passes with a nod or a “See ya, Steve” or “See ya, Cap.” Once the room was cleared Bucky approached him and he stood.

“Hey, Buck,” Steve grumbled, looking defeated.

“Hey, pal,” Bucky looked uncomfortable. “Look… I wish I would be here, I do, but Fury wants me and Natasha to leave on assignment in an hour to chase some Ten Rings leads in Asia… make sure they don’t join Ultron’s cause anytime soon. I should go pack,” he looked uncertain. “Unless you’d rather I stay here to fill you in..?”

Steve chuckled humorlessly. “Hell hath no fury like an angry Fury. Go ahead, Sam will fill me in. I’ll be fine.”

Bucky stared him down. “You were thinking about him again, weren’t you? About that night? While you were zoning out?”

Steve stiffened and put on a tight, emotionless face. “No. I’m fine, Sam can fill me in. Go ahead. I’ll be fine.”

“If you’re sure,” Bucky took one last long look at Steve before leaving. Steve watched him go.

“Well, I’m no Bucky Barnes, but I’m always here to talk to you, Cap. Whenever you need, come find me. We’ll work it out,” a voice from behind him called.

“Sam, you PTSD Counseling is showing,” Steve grinned lopsidedly.

“It’s the truth,” Sam paused for a minute, looking at Steve as if he could read his mind. “Well, I wasn’t paying attention to half of what flame-brain was saying but I’ll tell you what I know you want to hear. No sign of Ultron, HYDRA is with him, AIM base in Africa not so much.”

“Damn,” Steve suddenly banged his fist down on the metal table, leaving a dent. Sam didn’t even flinch. “I was so sure AIM was with him. His last spot was in Africa, I was hoping they could lead us to him…. Then what the hell was that arsenal for?”

Sam shrugged. “I don’t know, but I told everyone I’d ask Tony to look at the metal. T’Challa didn’t recognize it so it’s not Vibranium. I don’t know what it is.”

If Steve flinched at Tony’s name Sam didn’t mention it.

“How is he?” Steve’s voice was barely above a whisper. Sam had to strain to hear him.

“He’s… decent. He’s working hard in his lab on… something. Jarvis said he’d been down there for about two weeks living on Dumm-E’s smoothies and protein bars. He was passed out drunk on a table when I found him last night. Woke up sometime around one o’clock today. Everyone’s gone looking for Ultron all the time no one has time to go down there and force him to bed—“

“Ultron is important,” Steve said suddenly, and sternly. “Tony’s a grown man and should be able to take care of himself.” Steve suddenly looked guilty. “I had hoped kicking him off the team would push him to quit drinking but…”

The next five minutes were a tense, awkward, deafening silence.

“So how have you been?” Sam asked, turning a critical eye on his friend. “Really? None of this ‘I’m fine’ or ‘I’ll be okay’ bullshit.”

Steve sighed again, putting his arms on the table and lowering his head. “Horrible. But I can’t tell anyone, can I? They all already know that, I’m not going to sit there and make them listen to my complaints. Can’t get drunk, can take medication, can’t do drugs, so I have to just deal with it. And it sucks.”

There was silence for a minute before someone broke it. “Why are you doing this to yourself, Steve?” Sam asked quietly. “It’s been almost a year since it happened. Don’t you think if he was alive…?”

“No,” Steve’s voice was deep and commanding; his Captain America voice. “I refuse to believe he’s dead until I see a body in front of my own eyes. I just… I need proof. Last time this happened the man turned up alive. Granted, it was 70 years later, but I’m not taking chances this time. I’m going to find my son.”

Sam leaned forward and grabbed Steve's shaking hands. “Look. I know you care about your son, I get it. But it’s been a year. Maybe it’s finally time to just-”

“Pardon the interruption, Sir, but I have a message for Commander Rogers from James Howlett.” Sam cursed Logan’s timing in his mind.

“Let him through, Jarvis.”

“Can he hear me? Is this thing on? I hate technology... Cap? Cap! Suit up and fast. We found him. Some Japanese battleship off the coast of Japan saw him flying toward Nagasaki. We need to get going. We’re going after Ultron.”


End file.
